7 Reasons Why They Came Back After You've Gave Them Distance | Stoicism

Summary of "7 Reasons Why They Came Back After You've Gave Them Distance | Stoicism"

Short Summary:

This video explores the concept of "distancing" yourself from someone who takes you for granted, using Stoic principles to reclaim your power and value. The speaker argues that by creating distance, you force the other person to realize your worth and crave your presence. The video outlines seven reasons why this happens, including the shock of your unexpected growth, the magnetic pull of your self-sufficiency, the envy of your newfound confidence, the intrigue of your unpredictability, the realization of what they've lost, the desire to be part of your new journey, and the fear of losing you to someone else. The speaker emphasizes the importance of focusing on your own growth and well-being during this period of distance, as it is the key to attracting others and achieving a fulfilling life.

Detailed Summary:

Section 1: Introduction and Foundation

The video opens by describing a common scenario where someone who was taken for granted suddenly becomes desirable after creating distance.
The speaker emphasizes that simply walking away isn't enough; you must use the distance to focus on yourself and your own growth.
The speaker warns that if the other person didn't truly value you before, your absence might not have the desired effect.
Key quote: "If they treated you like trash, like a puppet, they didn't value you, not truly."

Section 2: Reason 1: The Shock of Unexpected Growth

People who take you for granted expect you to stay the same, but when you emerge as a transformed individual, it shocks them.
By focusing on your mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual growth, you become someone they barely recognize.
This unexpected growth creates a power shift, making you more desirable and intriguing.
Key quote: "People crave what they can't have and what they don't fully understand."

Section 3: Reason 2: The Magnetic Pull of Self-Sufficiency

When you become self-sufficient and independent, you radiate confidence and attract others.
You're no longer dependent on others for validation or happiness, making you more desirable.
Key quote: "He who has a why to live can bear anyhow."

Section 4: Reason 3: The Envy of Your Newfound Confidence

Your newfound confidence, gained through self-work, makes others envious and admire you.
This envy stems from their realization that they lack the same level of self-assurance.
Key quote: "Self-trust is the first secret of success."

Section 5: Reason 4: The Intrigue of Unpredictability

By becoming less predictable, you pique their curiosity and make them wonder about you.
This unpredictability breaks the monotony and keeps them engaged.
Key quote: "The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance."

Section 6: Reason 5: The Realization of What They've Lost

When they experience your absence, they start to realize the value you brought to their life.
They begin to miss the little things you did and regret taking you for granted.
This realization can lead to a deep sense of regret and a desire to regain what they've lost.
Key quote: "You don't know what you've got until it's gone."

Section 7: Reason 6: The Desire to Be Part of Your New Journey

They see your growth and transformation and want to be a part of your new journey.
They are drawn to the excitement and fulfillment you're experiencing.
This desire motivates them to step up and be a better version of themselves.

Section 8: Reason 7: The Fear of Losing You to Someone Else

The fear of you moving on with someone else who appreciates you drives them to crave your presence.
This fear motivates them to reevaluate their actions and consider what they might lose.
Key quote: "The power to transform your life is in your hands."

Conclusion:

The video concludes by emphasizing the importance of focusing on your own growth and well-being. By doing so, you create a life that others will naturally crave to be a part of. The speaker encourages viewers to embrace their journey and never settle for less than they deserve.