How to Make an OBSESSION in Someone Who DOESN'T VALUE You | STOICISM
Summary of "How to Make an OBSESSION in Someone Who DOESN'T VALUE You | STOICISM"
Short Summary:
This video explores the concept of obsession and how to make someone crave you, even if they don't initially value you. It presents various psychological techniques, drawing on Stoic philosophy, to influence someone's behavior and create a sense of desire. The video emphasizes the importance of creating mystery, playing hard to get, offering limited availability, and using intermittent reinforcement. It also discusses the potential dangers of manipulation and the importance of authenticity and respect in relationships.
Detailed Summary:
Section 1: Introduction
The video starts by introducing the concept of obsession and its ability to transform a simple crush into a full-blown obsession. It then introduces the idea of making someone crave you, even if they don't believe they want you.
Section 2: Create a Mystery
This section highlights the human fascination with the unknown and how creating an air of mystery can make you more appealing. The video suggests being selective with the information you share, using intriguing language, and leaving questions unresolved. It draws on the Stoic philosopher Seneca's observation that "something that frightens us is not the things that we do not know, but rather the things that we are aware of."
Section 3: Play Hard to Get
This section discusses the psychological principle of scarcity, where something becomes more desirable when it's scarce or difficult to acquire. The video suggests reducing your availability to create a sense of urgency and make the other person work harder for your attention. However, it also warns against the manipulative nature of this tactic and emphasizes the Stoic ideal of self-control and moderation.
Section 4: Offer Limited Availability
This section expands on the concept of scarcity by suggesting limiting your availability to create a sense of exclusivity. The video advises making yourself available only during certain hours or for specific activities to make the other person feel fortunate to have your time. It cautions against the potential for dependency and emphasizes the Stoic ideal of self-sufficiency.
Section 5: Provide Intermittent Reinforcement
This section introduces the concept of intermittent reinforcement, where inconsistent rewards can be highly addictive. The video suggests providing periodic praise, compliments, or attention to keep the other person on edge and seeking your approval. It warns against the dangers of seeking external validation and emphasizes the Stoic emphasis on internal validation and living in harmony with nature.
Section 6: Create a Sense of Urgency
This section explores the power of urgency in influencing behavior. The video suggests using time-sensitive language and expressions like "limited time offer" to prompt immediate action. It cautions against the potential for impulsive decision-making and emphasizes the Stoic ideal of reason and deliberate thought.
Section 7: Use Mirroring Techniques
This section discusses mirroring techniques, where you imitate the body language, speaking habits, and interests of the other person to build rapport and connection. It highlights the potential benefits of mirroring but also warns against its manipulative nature and emphasizes the Stoic value of authenticity.
Section 8: Offer Emotional Support
This section emphasizes the importance of offering emotional support to someone going through a challenging period. It suggests becoming a confidant and source of comfort to build a deeper connection. However, it also cautions against enabling dependency and emphasizes the Stoic ideal of self-sufficiency and resilience.
Section 9: Make Them Feel Special
This section explores the power of compliments and expressions of appreciation in boosting someone's self-esteem and encouraging desired behavior. It suggests frequent compliments and expressions of value to deepen the relationship. However, it also warns against excessive praise and emphasizes the Stoic value of moderation.
Section 10: Create a Sense of Exclusivity
This section focuses on creating a sense of exclusivity by making the other person feel like they have a unique connection with you. The video suggests disclosing personal information, participating in shared experiences, and limiting your social circle. It cautions against unhealthy attachments and emphasizes the Stoic ideal of self-development and balanced relationships.
Section 11: Play Mind Games
This section warns against the manipulative nature of playing mind games, which involve causing confusion and uncertainty. It discusses tactics like sending mixed messages, gaslighting, and leading someone on. It emphasizes the Stoic value of clarity and honesty in communication.
Section 12: Use Jealousy as a Tool
This section condemns the use of jealousy as a manipulative tool to make someone feel insecure and desperate for your attention. It discusses tactics like flirting with others and hinting at other potential partners. It emphasizes the Stoic values of respect and kindness in relationships.
Section 13: Exploit Their Weaknesses
This section condemns exploiting someone's weaknesses as a manipulative strategy. It discusses tactics like playing on fear, guilt-tripping, and emotional blackmail. It emphasizes the Stoic values of compassion and understanding.
Conclusion
The video concludes by reiterating the dangers of manipulative tactics and emphasizing the importance of authenticity, respect, and healthy relationships. It encourages viewers to seek professional help if they are struggling with unhealthy relationships or negative emotions.